In honor of the new year I will tell a quick story of the greatest bowl-game TV viewing day ever: Jan. 1, 1986. Of course this is subjective and relates only to my own viewing experience, which was enhanced by my fellow football-watchers, the beverages and vittles and the perfect locale. And now thanks to the stupid revenue-seeking schedule that has the few meaningful bowl games spread out until February, it may never come this way again.
The locale may have been the best part of this supreme day; we were all at our friend Grant Gardner’s condo, since he was the first among all of us to get his own place. I think we had even crashed there after celebrating New Year’s Eve: The core crew that day was myself, my one year-older brother, Grant and my two high school running mates, Tom “Floyd” Pettett and Brian “The Tool” Bartsch. And all we did, all damn day long, was sit or slump on the collection of couches in the condo basement, and watch one game after another: Cotton, Fiesta, Rose, Sugar and Orange.
I don’t specifically remember the order of the games or caring that Oklahoma would be crowned national champion after its Orange Bowl victory over Penn State. What I do remember is grooming the hair of the dog by draining multiple aluminum cans of Old Style beer, the quaffing favorite of us Chicagoland types. By sometime about mid-Rose Bowl we were all practicing the “I’m empty” move of reverse-dunking the used-up can over the back of the main sofa, where it would crash into the pile of other dead soldiers that had preceded it. Someone else would then perform the act of kindness of refilling the most recent empty hand with another full can. Part of the perfect day, you never had to get your own brew or get up off the couch.
I have a picture, which I won’t post here, of Floyd and Tool laid out snoozing on the two perpendicular couches with an oversized Old Style lamp in between them. They are in an advanced state of Old Style-consumption and bowl-game watching; I am guessing the Orange Bowl halftime was responsible for their nap-break. Sometime during the day I think I remember Grant grilling up some burgers or chili or maybe we ordered Jake’s deep-dish pizza.
I know from the picture we snarfed down at least one bag of Jewel-store brand “petite pretzels.” I am reasonably sure we had some bags of Lay’s or Jay’s chips, but perhaps not some bean dip (which is another story for hoops season). Bottom line was, we had everything we needed for the perfect day of uninterrupted football viewing: No interfering family members, an inexhaustable supply of fermented malt beverages and a perfectly timed parade of meaningful, Division 1 games to entertain us. We were all just out of college or in the process of finishing up so there weren’t yet any significant others or Jan. 2 workdays to concern us. It was just a bunch of good friends hunkered down for a full day of festive bowl watching. The likes of which may never come this way again.
